The Mysterious Red Dot of Doom
by BlindDestiny
Summary: Awake one night, Inuyasha stumbled upon a 'demon' with no scent or aura. The bloody thing is just so annoying! Now he's determined to find out what this damned thing is and destroy it! Especially when it gets into the wrong hands...
1. Homoerotic Mayhem

**Disclaimer: **Don't own it.

**Title- **The Mysterious Red Dot of Doom!

**Summary-** Awake one night at camp, Inuyasha discovers a peculiar 'demon' in the form of a bright red dot. It has no scent, no real aura to it at all, but Inuyasha has to go after it because it's so bloody annoying! Rated for Inuyasha's mouth due to frustration!

**Author's Notes- **Something I came up while I was actually doing this to my own dog. It's very funny. I don't want to give anything away, but when you _do_ discover what the red dot is, I suggest that _every_ dog owner gets one. The hilarity is literally endless.

xXx

It was dark, that's for sure. There was only a sliver of moon left in the sky, waxing, but small nonetheless.

Enter our favourite hanyou, Inuyasha, sitting awake in a tree of course. Eyes closed, he remains alert, the rustling of leaves practically makes him fall out of the tree.

"Damn it all." He muttered under his breath, a growl erupting from his throat. He glanced down at the slumbering bunch beneath him; they were still. Well, save Shippou rolling over, snoring. Kagome brushed him off, annoyed and turned away in her sleep. Now Shippou lies on his back, snoring quite loudly; a bit of drool peeking over his lip.

Inuyasha cringed, "Disgusting little brat…"

Just then, a small acorn hit him in the head from below. His eyebrow twitched in annoyance and he glared at Shippou, who was still sleeping but his legs were moving at an alarmed rate, like he was running, and his arm was extended into the air. It was just hanging there, like a tree. Apparently, he tossed the acorn at Inuyasha in his sleep.

Inuyasha paid no mind to this. He simply chucked the acorn back at the kitsune. It struck him straight in the forehead and he stayed still for a while.

Just stayed still. He didn't moved. Everything about him was still, save his mouth suddenly opening and a loud "AHHH!" came from him.

But it was a simple "AHHH!". It was punctuated. More like "AHHH." but louder. Then he stopped, like nothing had happened and rolled back over.

Inuyasha was now on the other side of the tree, clinging onto the trunk for dear life. "Stupid kid! He could have woken everyone up!"

He continued to glare at the slumbering kitsune, and his rage was just boiling I tell ya. You could tell because he was still growling._ (If I were sitting at home, watching this scene on TV, I'd be rolling around laughing my ass off; because I usually mock the characters. Example: I'd be screaming "GRR!" right now. Yeah, random)_

Before he could really lose it, he noticed a small dot on the tip of his nose. It shone brightly in contrast to his face and it was… well… bright!

"What the hell? Who are you?" He spoke to it. All the received for a response was the thing twittering across his facial features. He shut his eyes tightly and groaned when it reached his eyes.

"You challenging me, bastard?"

With the threat, the dot moved to the tree trunk in a blink of an eye.

It's fast… Probably even faster than Sesshomaru… 

He quirked an eyebrow when the dot spun around in a circle, then cheerily made figure eight's on the tree trunk. Needless to say, Inuyasha was getting severely annoyed. With a swipe of his claws, the dot disappeared. All that was left was a gap in the tree, the bright wood stuck out in the darkness.

The hanyou chuckled in accomplishment and cracked his knuckles arrogantly, "Heh, knew I could beat 'em!"

Just then, all the readers died of his horrible wording skills.

He gazed around the camp after his 'kill'. Nothing seemed out of place… other than that blasted dot was on Miroku's nose now. There it was… sitting there… twittering… _mocking_ him!

With a deep growl, Inuyasha bounded out of the tree and landed silently in front of Miroku. He sat in front of the monk and just stared at him. Just stared. No other words could explain the strange homoerotic looking that was going on here. _(Sorry, I just had to use to word 'homoerotic'.)_

The dot never wavered. It sat there in all it's 'mocking' glory, and Inuyasha sat there as well, stewing in all his pissed-off… glory?

Anyway, Miroku started to feel uneasy. Who could blame the poor guy? I mean, there's a hanyou just inches from your face… _staring_ at you… for some kami-awful unknown reason. When the monk's eyes finally opened, he noticed Inuyasha's reeled back palm and the serious look about him.

He flinched, gritted his teeth, and his eyes flew wide open as Inuyasha took his palm and smacked Miroku right on the nose without a second thought. Miroku flew in the direction he was slapped and held his cheek in agony.

"Ah! Inuyasha, what's gotten into you!" He screamed from his disposition.

"Huh? Miroku? Did I wake you?" The hanyou spoke so nonchalantly it made Miroku sick.

"Did you wake me? You slapped me! My good man, that's just over the line!" The monk stood up very proudly.

"What? You had a demon on your face! Am I supposed to just let it posses you or do whatever it was trying to do?"

Miroku's eyebrows flew up, "Oh? Is that what you were doing?"

Inuyasha turned around and crossed his arms, "Keh. Don't worry about it, Monk. You're just lucky I killed it for you!"

Miroku wasn't really paying attention to the hanyou's attempt for attention. He was more focused on Inuyasha's backside.

The hanyou followed the hentai's gaze and gaped. "You letch!" He screamed rather femininely and held his hands over his butt. With that Miroku seemed to be snapped out of his spell.

"What? No, no! Inuyasha turn around!" He sounded a bit worried.

"Hell no!" Was Inuyasha's response.

"No, Inuyasha… The demon was on you… now-"

"What! Where? I'll kill it!" Inuyasha spun around on the spot like a little kid, but without his arms extended. Miroku could only stare flatly at the hanyou. Growing tired of the show, the monk grabbed Inuyasha's shoulder and put his back towards him. Inuyasha watched in terror as Miroku reeled back his staff and struck him, very smartly, on the ass.

It took a few moments for Inuyasha to find his voice, but when he did… oh, when he did…"What the hell, monk!?!"

"Shh! Do you want to wake up Sango and Kagome!" He whispered.

"No, but still… what the _hell_ monk!"

Miroku grinned, "Well I've successfully vanquished the demon! That's what!"

Inuyasha looked at him flatly, "I'm sure you did, letch…"

The monk quirked an eyebrow, "What was that?"

"Nothing."

Miroku nodded and turned to go back to sleep, but something caught his eye and he gasped.

"This thing is… unbeatable!" He gawked.

Inuyasha looked over his shoulder, "What is?"

The red dot was swirling around in circles, laughing at them. Inuyasha growled and dove at it, falling in the dirt. The dot moved ever so slightly forward down the path, diverting the attack.

"Come back here, you coward!" He yelled and dove after it again.

And yet again, the dot moved and escaped but was still staring him in the face. Inuyasha continued to dive after it down the path, missing every time.

"Inuyasha!" Miroku shouted, "Violence is not the answer," He pulled out a sutra charm and spoke with a dash of arrogance, "I must purify the demon using my sutras!"

"Yeah right, you fake monk!" The hanyou yelled back and dove for the dot again.

Miroku's brow twitched and his eyes closed in frustration. "Look, I don't get angry when you call me a letch, but how _dare_ you call me a fake!"

"Just shut up and get over here!" he screamed and pounded his fist into the dirt where the dot was. But every single time he'd raise his fist up the dot was still there. Then he just got too angry and pounded at the dirt until he had to put his arm into a hole up to his elbow to reach the bottom. Miroku walked up and placed a sutra charm over the hole and made a hand motion like he was praying.

"Let the power of Buddha purify you!" He wailed and stuck his staff through the charm and to the bottom of the hole and patted the bottom of said hold twice. "That should do it!"

"Finally," Inuyasha yawned, "Let's get some sleep already."

The monk nodded, "Yes, I'm rather tired myself."

When the two walked the couple of yards to camp, no one noticed Kagome laughing rather hysterically under her breath. Not even Inuyasha noticed that the modern girl was in tears she was laughing so hard, but ever so discretely.

Miroku, feeling no shame, took the liberty to gaze lovingly at Sango's backside and basically looked her up and down from there. He stopped on her breasts of course, being the hentai that he is, but there seemed to be something on her kimono…

A tiny red dot!

A determined look spread across his features and he reached for Sango's… ahem… without hesitation. Just as his hand connected her eyes shot open in horror.

_"You lecherous monk!"_

XxX

**Author's Notes**—Okay, just something random and surprisingly homoerotic. Lmao I loved writing it myself, but I want to know what it was like from the other end. It should get funnier from here on out. Probably because it's about 1:30 in the morning right now… anyway…

Until I can think of other things,

**-Destiny**


	2. Swimming in Our Misfortunes

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.**

**Author's Notes-** Okay, okay. I've really been trying to come up with stuff that will out-do the first chapter. After thinking about it, that was really hard to do... But I've gotten my muse back and... yeah.

xXx

_"You lecherous monk!" _Sango shrieked in absolute horror as Miroku's hand made contact with her chest.

Apparently, after Sango's screaming assaulted his ears, Miroku realized what he had just done. His eyes widened beyond their limits and a look of straight fear struck his face. He visibly paled as Sango leaned forward with her hand reeled back.

"Please, Sango! Don't be rash!" He squeaked quickly, but she wasn't listening and threw her hand at his temple with demonic speed. The monk flew to the side and voiced a groan, being it was the second time he'd been slapped that day. The slayer towered over Miroku's collapsed form and glowered dangerously at him. He started shaking and curled tightly into the fetal position, murmuring something about "Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn".

Sango narrowed her eyes into small slits and rammed her foot into Miroku's side. Her hand immediately went to her weapon and she brought it down to severely bonk the monk on the head. She was so swept up in beating the living crap out of Miroku that she failed to notice anything else.

Kagome sat up and leaned on her elbows, then cringed every time the giant boomerang made contact. There was a strange contraption in her hand in basically clear view but no one paid attention to it. Inuyasha's jaw hung ajar as he watched Sango push Miroku into the Choir Invisible. Hell, a few more hits on the head like that and Inuyasha would swear that the monk would be pushing up the daisies by dawn.

Miroku, the poor, misunderstood pervert that he is, was knocked unconscious by the first blow to the head. Sango, her wrath not having been drained yet, was still pounding the monk's skull into the dirt. By now everyone was starting to get worried. Maybe she was planning to actually kill him...

Just when that thought crossed the bystanders' minds, Sango reeled back for one last strike, and it looked like a lethal one. Kagome shot up in her sleeping bag and Sango threw the weapon forward and rammed it into the ground beside Miroku's skull. Inuyasha loosened up his shoulder's from the tension but Kagome's spine was still ramrod straight.

Inuyasha looked down at how shocked Kagome looked and quirked an eyebrow at her. "Why are you so shocked? It's not like this doesn't happen all the time." The miko blinked a few times before resting her gaze on Inuyasha, and suddenly something hit her. She frantically pushed something into her pocket and he immediately became suspicious.

Inuyasha keeled down next to her sleeping bag and had to resist rolling his eyes when she tried to look innocently up at the trees. "What was that?"

Kagome's voice was light and high-pitched. "What was what?" she lied through her fake sugary-sweet voice.

Now he did roll his eyes. "Don't be dumb, you know what I'm talking about."

She started to squirm uneasily at his inquiries. "No... What are you talking about, Inuyasha?"

A light growl of frustration erupted from his throat, "Is your brain broken or something?" Kagome glared at him. "You know what I mean! I just saw you stuff something in your pocket!" He accused her and reached down to fish it out.

Thinking quickly, she screamed and bonked the hanyou on the head. Then she crossed her arms over herself tightly like he was trying to take advantage of her. "What are you doing!" she squealed.

Inuyasha rubbed his abused skull and glowered at her. "What am _I _doing? What's your problem! I wasn't trying anything!"

She huffed, "Yeah right! You figured since Miroku got out alive in the end then you would too, huh!"

A light pink colour dusted his cheeks and his voice sputtered, "_What_? Why would I touch _you_!"

Now it was Kagome's turn to glare, "So now I'm ugly!?! That's a lot coming from someone who just tried to feel me up!"

"I still don't get why I would touch you!" he yelled back.

"I don't need your insults!" She whined and made her voice crack so she would further divert Inuyasha's attention from her pocket. "Just go help Miroku or something! Kami knows you've spent enough time with him!"

Inuyasha's eye twitched in annoyance until he heard her voice crack. "What? Kagome, are you crying? Common what are you doing?"

She shook her head violently and sniffed. "Nothing. Don't worry about it."

"How am I supposed to now worry about it! You _are_ crying!" He pointed an accusing finger in her direction.

"I am not crying! Shut up!" She "wailed" and put her back to him.

He leaned up to her and looked panicked. "Common, Kagome cut it out."

Kagome wiped the invisible tears with the back of her hand and turned to glare at him. "I told you I'm not crying! So leave it alone!"

"Shut up, you were to crying!" he retorted.

She took a deep breath and Inuyasha's figure went visibly straight and his eyes bugged out. "Sit you jerk!" The last part of the sentence was cut off by a loud 'Bam!' from when Inuyasha's face went crashing into the grass. There was a tiny valley imprinted in the ground roughly the size of his head afterwards. A muffled growl reached Kagome's ears and she looked down at a fuming hanyou.

"What'd ya do that for!?!" he yelled.

She crossed her arms and huffed. "You deserved it, jerk."

Inuyasha simply muttered, "Keh," and before you knew it, he swiftly leaped into the branches of the tree he was in at the beginning of this story.

Kagome smiled to herself in victory. He was so easy to distract. She looked over to the previous center of attention and found the two of them in the same positions they were in before she stopped noticing. Miroku was slumped over in the fetal position on the ground, a few scars on the ground and many more adorning his face. Sango was so out of if from beating Miroku that when she rested on her weapon she just fell asleep. She was leaning onto it while kneeling and resting her chin on her hand.

An extremely loud snore followed by a hiccup snapped Kagome's attention away from the monk and slayer. She looked down to see Shippou just as asleep as he was in the beginning, not disturbed in the slightest.

XxX

It was yet another bright and annoying sunny afternoon on the practically abandoned path that the group followed. Kagome still found herself laughing hysterically at last night's events, and today she had a few more tricks up her sleeve. It would turn to twilight soon, and she could only make the dot appear at night, making it a bit inconvenient, but she had used the daylight to come up with more schemes.

The miko was sporting a toothy grin as Shippou pointed out a village in the distance up ahead. Since the village was a ways down the path, it would still take a while to reach, and there was a twinge of a demonic aura around the area.

As soon as it was late enough for the sky to burn orange, a petty looking spider demon crawled out from the depths of the cave-infested woods. It was about as tall as transformed-Kirara and looked like just a giant spider. It voiced a strange sort of an attack noise and threw a web of sleek silk at Inuyasha.

With cat... uh... dog-like reflexes Inuyasha whipped is claws at the web that was flying towards him, shredding it into several pieces. The spider's eyes widened in fear and tried to run away, but Inuyasha pretty much just waved at him and the signature yellow slashes flew at the demon. It wailed in despair but was only chopped into a few hundred chunks.

No one in the group said anything. It was too easy of a victory for any of them to utter a "Good job". A light applause rang through the air to the Inu-Tachi's hearing range, and all five (or six if you count Kirara) heads spun around to see practically the entire village sauntering up the dirt path to meet them. The head of the group clapped his hands wildly.

"Thank you so very much for vanquishing that horrible demon for us! It's been harassing our village for quite some time now!"

Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Inuyasha, and Shippou all sweat-dropped at once, thinking the same thing: _'That puny demon's been harassing you?'_

Kagome was the one to speak up, "Oh, it's nothing, really."

The head of the village shook his head and placed his hands in front of him with the palms outward. "No, no! You all shall stay the night at our finest inn for a reward! No charge and a meal shall be provided for you just to show our gratitude!"

The group looked at one another and shrugged. Although it was no problem whatsoever, they might as well take the village up on their offer.

Well, no problem save Inuyasha being just one step closer to developing carpal tunnel that is.

xXx

"Wow, Kagome! You can really make a shiny red dot with this contraption?" Shippou whispered.

Kagome nodded and giggled, "Yes, but shh! I don't want anyone else to find out about it."

Shippou hummed in understanding but still looked at the device in his hands confusedly. Kagome noticed this and took it from his hands, a mischievous grin playing across her face.

"Watch this." She whispered from behind another giggle and pointed out the large door of their room. There was a small pond directly athwart from their inn rooms and Inuyasha just so happened to be walking around on the other side of it. The moon and stars reflected off the surface vividly and Kagome gained a genius idea.

Shippou watched in absolute amusement as the tiny red dot appeared on the surface of the water and Inuyasha noticed it immediately. There it was, that... _thing!_ His newest enemy was back again! And Frosty's chance in hell he was going to let it get away again.

Without a second thought- actually, without a _first_ thought- he leaped after it, trying to catch it in his grasp. It was only when he felt the shock of cold water hit him that he realized... he could not walk on water. There was a large splash and both Kagome and Shippou doubled over in hysterical laughter. Tears were beading at the corners of their eyes and their abdomens started to sting.

Not even Kagome could have seen that coming. She didn't think he'd be that desperate to destroy the dot... she was wrong.

The sound of pissed-off footsteps and beads of water splashing on the floor caught the two's attention but they were soon laughing their arses off again. In the doorway stood a very wet and- yes- a very pissed-off Inuyasha, soaked to his bone marrow in smelly pond water.

He growled at their laughter before rattling his spine and shaking off most of the water in a very canine-like fashion. Kagome only laughed harder upon seeing this.

He huffed and stuffed his hands in his sleeves. "So you think that's funny?"

Kagome wiped her eyes and nodded. "Yes... Yes I do."

Inuyasha glared at her with a smirk pulling on the corners of his mouth. "Well, let's just see how much you like it."

The miko's face went blank and Inuyasha quickly moved towards her. She tried to crawl away but she was still laughing too hard and he scooped her up. Her arms and legs were flailing as she squirmed to get away but he held a determined grip on her.

"Inuyasha! Don't do it! Lemme go!" She cried, and started beating her fists on his shoulder.

Inuyasha simply smirked evily and chucked her into the air over the water. A shrill scream assaulted his ears but was soon muffled by a splash and the cold water engulfing the source. Before he could even try to resist the urge, he fell onto his side, holding his abdomen, laughing his head off.

Kagome sprang up out of the water, drenched to her core. Her hair was stuck to her face like glue and she shivered thoroughly.

"Inuyasha!" She screamed.

He just kept laughing, and a now very-pissed Kagome stormed out of the water and glowered dangerously at him. Inuyasha gazed up at her innocently but his face quickly fell.

It wasn't from the look on her face, but from her shirt. Kagome followed his gaze and realized that her shirt was white...

She frantically tried to cover herself but his gaze wasn't wavered. He just kept starring with his jaw slightly ajar.

"Would you stop gawking already!" She muttered, a light pink falling on her cheeks.

Inuyasha only shook his head and stood up, still looking at her. He couldn't believe it. The dot. _The dot!_ Was on Kagome now...

...and he'd be damned if he let it get away with whatever it was trying to do. (That and the things feeling her up at the moment. And we all know that _no one_ gets away with that!)

XxX

**Author's Notes-** Alrighty... That was fun. Haha, not as good as the first, from my perspective but maybe that's just me. My favourite part's the carpal tunnel. I've got other fics to update on and many more ideas to come up with...

**Until then,**

**-Destiny**


	3. Kya!

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Author's Notes--** Sorry for the long wait... I've been trying to write a chapter as amusing as the previous ones... I guess I got it... but I don't know. That's where the reader comes in. I have an (unfinished) hand written two-pager for this chapter. Written during classes in my broken cursive, haha.

xXx

Flustered, Kagome covered her shirt with her arms defensively. "What are you staring at me like that for!?"

Inuyasha just blinked, his gaze never lifted from the red dot she was unknowingly sporting. A dazed expression was spread across his face, and his voice was frighteningly serious. "Kagome. Don't move." She tensed, not from his command, but from his voice. "Now be calm... and take off your shirt."

Kagome's jaw dropped to the ground, an appalled look on her face. _"What!?" _She took a step backward, "Are you _insane_!?"

Finally, the ignorant hanyou gave her a hard stare in the face instead of her chest, "Don't be stupid. I'm trying to help you!" he barked, grabbing her by the arms and making her outrageously uncomfortable. "Now take it off!"

"No way!" she screamed, writhing in his grip. "Lemme go, you brute!"

He scoffed at the "brute" comment. "Don't be ridiculous!" he yelled. She continued to resist his vice until finally, her footing was lost and he shoved her back into the dirt. Swapping his grasp from her arms to her wrist, he placed her hands above her head and his free hand on her abdomen. "Shippou! Help me hold her down!"

The young kitsune, completely oblivious to the innuendo, tucked something in his shirt before bouncing towards the quarreling couple. Kagome looked up, her eyes pleading, and Inuyasha tightened his grip on her wrist. "What are you doing to her?" Shippou asked, bewildered.

The hanyou answered without missing a beat, "Trying to get her to hold still so I can get her shirt off!"

Kagome's face heated up at his explanation, and he still had no idea what he was saying. "Do you see yourself, you pervert!!"

"Stop yelling! I'm trying to help you!"

"I don't need _that_ kind of help!"

"If you two don't mind..." Both Kagome and Inuyasha glanced up at the drowsy monk standing in the doorway to his own room. "Could you perhaps take your shenanigans inside? Others are trying to get some rest." he yawned, not phased in the slightest by their stunned faces, and returned to his room.

Kagome blushed madly at her and Inuyasha's disposition, especially since Miroku had walked in on it.

Sadly enough, during her stupor, Inuyasha stopped paying attention to the monk. When he returned to his room, the hanyou took advantage of Kagome's comatose state and proceeded to yank her top off.

She screamed.

At the top of her lungs, she let out a stupendous trophy of lung capacity.

Shippou fled to the inn room, scared by Kagome's screech. Covering herself, she scrambled to her feet. "Inuyasha!! What are you doing!!" she wailed, her face a deep crimson. Inuyasha didn't even look up at her. He was too busy searching and sniffing her stolen shirt. "Are you listeinng to me!?"

Inuyasha held out her shirt away from himself, baffled. "Where the hell did it go?"

_"Inuyasha!!"_

At the shriek of his name he flinched and cautiously glanced up. He caught the sight of Kagome's blushing, half-naked posture and at last realized what he had been doing. He dropped her shirt, and blushed darker than she was. "Uhh..." he laughed uneasily.

Kagome glowered at him. "What. In. The. _Hell_!" she panted, her slender body shivering from the pond water she was still drenched in.

"Um- Ka- gome... I..." he rambled, sweating the thought of her wrath. Noticing the goosebumps on her arms, he vigilantly slipped off his haroi and handed it to her. She graciously took it and covered herself, taking a deep breath.

_"Sit!!"_

Inuyasha clenched his eyes shut as the prayer beads around his neck trembled and he was once again reunited with the ground. He growled from his self-shaped crater and glared at the girl, who returned his angry expression.

"You don't have to overreact!" he shouted.

She huffed, "You don't have to try to rip my shirt off!"

"Just 'cause there was a demon on it!"

Kagome blinked and her voice softened, "A demon?"

He sat himself up and crossed his arms over his chest. "Keh. Excuse me for trying to save you. Don't come crying to me when it comes back!"

"Oh... well..." she paused, "You could have said something! Kami knows Miroku's thinking you were trying to seduce me!" Her hands went to her face in dismay.

Inuyasha's face flushed a bit. "Stupid lech... drawing conclusions..."

"Yeah..." she gulped at the thought of the monk's presumptuous nature. "He's too quick to judge..."

The two glanced at each other from the corner of their eyes and just a quickly turned away, their cheeks blazing. Both of them shuddered, thinking the same thing.

"The next few days are gonna be _awkward_..."

XxX

_The following morning... _

"Goodbye everyone! Thank you for the hospitality!" Kagome waved to the villagers with a huge smile stuck to her face. She turned back to her friends' backs as they kept walking. Eventually, she caught up to them, and Shippou bounced into the basket of the bicycle she pushed by her side.

"Hey, Kagome." Shippou whispered, beckoning the miko to come closer to him.

She inched her face closer to his level, "What is it Shippou?"

"This thing you let me borrow..." His voice was extremely discrete, "Why doesn't it show up during the day?"

A slightly alarmed look sprouted onto Kagome's features. "Shh! Shippou. Do you know how angry..." She didn't have to continue. Images of Inuyasha tearing him limb from limb, ripping off his legs and beating him with them, and the like were already rushing through Shippou's mind.

"Uh-huh..." The kitsune visually shuttered, chills dripping off his spine.

Kagome nodded, knowing good and well what Shippou was thinking at the moment.

A few hours into their trek, the group stopped for some lunch... because that's just what they do.

"I'm gonna go for a walk." Shippou stated, standing up and walking towards the forest.

"Keh. Don't get lost or killed or anything, or I'll be the blame." Inuyasha blurted whilst slurping on his ramen.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome shouted like a housewife before turning to Shippou, "He means be careful. You can take Kirara with you, right?"

The kitsune contemplated it. "Sure! Common, Kirara!" Shippou pointed into the direction he wanted to go and the youkai neko meowed in acceptance.

When they were gone, Kagome sunk into her spot on the grass. "I hope they'll be alright..."

Inuyasha scoffed, "Keh. They'll be fine. Shippou may be useless but Kirara can defend the both of them." He tossed his empty ramen cup and chopsticks into the fire, watching them burn.

Sango hummed in thought, "I don't know. I was talking to some villagers last night and there have been rumors of some formidable youkai this area."

"Yeah but to those villagers, a ladybug is formidable." Inuyasha muttered with a flat expression.

Kagome giggled at his sarcasm. "Of course, but you have to think about Shippou just being a child... and I don't know if Kirara will be enough if a really big youkai comes along..."

Miroku stood from his spot and shut his eyes in deep concentration. "There does seem to be some sort of aura around... but it's nothing like Naraku."

"Yeah... so?" Inuyasha looked at the monk like he was mental. "I've felt the aura too but it's nothing to be worried about." A gentle tug on his sleeve caused him to redirect his attention from the monk. Kagome looked up at him with an apprehensive glance.

"Inuyasha, you and Miroku should follow Shippou, just in case." she spoke softly, like she was vigilant.

He huffed and crossed his arms, "Keh. Why should we? The brat can take care of himself, can't he?"

"That's the question I'm asking myself." her voice hardened and she wasn't afraid of his reactions anymore. "Follow him but don't let him know that you are. Shippou has about as much pride as you do!" she put her finger in his face and pressed the tip of his nose.

He scoffed and swatted her away. "Fine, whatever. Let's go Miroku."

The monk nodded, "Yes. Let's. At least it will put the girls' minds at ease." he spoke with a smile and a gentle wave. What a gentleman...

"Thanks guys." Kagome smiled and waved back while Sango sat there silently- probably making silent threats to Miroku's phony knight-in-shining-armor charisma.

xXx

"Kya!" Shippou cried. He quickly whipped out a small metal object and pointed it at a nearby tree. A tiny red dot appeared on the bark and Kirara instinctively pounced it.

The kitsune chuckled and looked at his new weapon. Going to the deepest, darkest part of the forest to practice was the best idea he's had in a while. Again he shouted "Kya!" and aimed at another spot. Kirara tried attacking once more, and Shippou cackled. This cycle went on for a while.

The sound of a twig snapping immediately caught his attention. He swirled around at an astonishing speed and pointed his weapon high up in the direction the sound came from. Before he could release his battle cry (aka "Kya!"), a groan of discomfort came from the shadows. This groan quickly transformed into an extremely menacing growl...

Shippou gulped, "Uh-oh..."

"Shippou you little brat!!" Inuyasha roared as he bounded towards the tiny fox.

"Ah! Inuyasha!" he screamed, scrambling away from the enraged hanyou. "I'm sorry!"

The hanyou just scoffed and leaped so he landed in front of Shippou. "Yeah, right! I knew you were the one behind that blasted red dot! I should kill you for what you've put us through!"

Shippou screamed at the top of his lungs, causing Inuyasha to practically tumble to the ground and cover his mouth.

"Would you knock it off! Besides, Kagome would punish you too. Since you did make us go through that little charade back at the village..." he glowered at the fox kit and held him in the air by the back of his collar.

"Stop! Stop! I'll do whatever you want!" Shippou wailed, his arms and legs flailing madly.

Miroku finally stepped from the shadows with a wicked grin pulling on his lips. "Anything, Shippou?"

The kitsune's eyes widened, and he took in a deep breath. "KA-GO-ME!!"

Inuyasha visibly tensed and threw the fox to the ground with force. "Shut up you little brat!" he barked.

Miroku started to look around with fear written across his features. "If the girl's find us like this..." he brought his free palm to his temple in worry, "Oh, I don't want to face that judgment day!"

Meanwhile, Shippou picked himself up from the dirt and began bouncing up and down shrieking "Kagome! Kagome!".

Inuyasha and Miroku eyed each other to think of a plan. The hanyou's ear flipped into the direction of the oncoming girls and did the first thing that came to mind.

"Kagome! Kagome! Kago- AHHH!!" Shippou kept yelping before Inuyasha's foot made contact on his torso, sending him flying helplessly above the treetops.

Almost a second after Shippou's takeoff Kagome emerged from the trees with an alert expression. "What happened to Shippou!?" she panted.

"I don't know." Inuyasha started speaking right when she stopped and quickly, like he knew what she was going to say. He had a slightly goofy and nervous grin on his face.

Kagome eyed him suspiciously and turned to the monk. Miroku held his hand in front of him and shook his head. "I don't know either!"

The miko sighed before heading into a random part of the woods to search for the missing kitsune. Right when she was out of earshot the boys relaxed, releasing the breath they had been holding, and slumped over.

Miroku glanced at Inuyasha with a humorous smile on his features. "You're a genius... Do it again!"

XxX

**Author's Notes--** Okay, a bit longer I guess... And yes, I did steal the last bit of dialogue from Jeff Dunham. So I don't own that... it's part of his comedic routine. At least I updated! I hope it was amusing!

**Shunsatsu!,**

_**-Destiny**_


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